Confessions of a Kind Heart
by CherokeeRosa
Summary: Begins somewhere after 4.02 and the aftermath of Carol's actions, this is my view on the whole thing and how it should have played out. It knits together with the show at first. Mainly Carol & Daryl but other characters are thrown in for good measure. K for possible language later.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hi, I'm very new to this. I'm an English Walking Dead fan and this is the first Walking Dead Fic I've written and in fact the first fic I've written in a very long time. Too long! This story just sort of came to me after episode 4.04 and I just had to write it. It's been quite difficult getting back into the swing so please bear with me, I like to think it gets better. I've already written 7 of 8 chapters so I'll upload as often as I can. Although I've not posted until now I've been hanging around quite a bit and there's some really great stories out there. I have to admit to mainly reading the Carol/Daryl centric fics so it's no surprise to find that mine is of the same subject. Like I said, I'm a Brit so I hope it reads well for those overseas. I'd love to know what you think. Thanks for taking the time to read. :)  
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**Chapter One  
**

_Tyreese; "Somebody dragged them out here and set them on fire! They killed them and they set them on fire!"_

She lingered a while at the door, hesitantly glancing around before taking a step inside. Cautiously she perched on the edge of the mattress and sighing heavily she exhaled a breath she wasn't even aware she'd been holding. The damage was done for better for worse, she'd done it. She wasn't sure it had been the right thing to do but it was too late for that now. She placed her head in her hands and sighed again. It was a sigh filled with frustration and exhaustion as she tried desperately to battle her own thoughts of doubt and confusion. She knew now she'd have to face the consequences but she had more important things to worry about, mainly, everyone else. There was no time to spend contemplating what might happen to her, it was futile to even try, and besides, she should be preoccupied making sure that everyone was safe. That was her job. The self-appointed role she'd fallen into ever since... well, she liked to think it had always been in her nature, but now more so since the outbreak. The only difference now was she actually knew she could protect them. She was stronger now, she wasn't anyone's burden, she could fight and she could lead. Somebody had to start thinking seriously about the future and the ways and means of protecting what they had. That's why she' didn't regret what she'd done. It was the right thing to do, she knew that, but she didn't like it.

She heard the faint noise of a woman's laughter in the distance and snapped out of her thoughts. She remembered where she was and quickly wiped away the lone tear she was ashamed to find had managed to break her defences and escape down her cheek. They'll be expecting lunch soon she thought absentmindedly. She'd go in a minute. They could wait a few more minutes longer, she was sure no one was heading out on a run and would need feeding sooner. Sod them, today they could wait.

She sat there in defiance for all of 30 seconds before the guilt got the better of her and she thought about getting up. She was too kind-hearted for her own good sometimes. One of these days she'd do something for herself for once. A frown appeared on her face clouding the nice thought she'd created. She knew things would be different soon. Consequences. That would have to be her word for the day and it sent butterflies swirling around her stomach, Her wave of nausea was short-lived, luckily interrupted by the sound of feet below. She ignore it and placing her head in her hands again she stayed as quiet as she could hoping to avoid whoever was coming to ask about their lunch. It didn't matter, they'd never look for her here and so she relaxed again, zoning out into her own little lost and confused world.

"Carol?"

She was snapped back with a start moments later. Her annoyance at being found was short-lived when she quickly identified the man in the doorway.

"Oh, Daryl", she replied somewhat apologetically. He leant against the doorframe and paused, unsure of how to proceed. A few moments passed in comfortable silence before Daryl concluded that he'd have to be the one to instigate conversation.

"Did you need somefin?" He asked as kindly as possible, detecting that something was obviously bothering her. It took a moment before he got his reply.

"Oh..." She started, "Um, no I'm good", she lied. It was easier and fairer on him; he wouldn't want to get involved in all of her problems.

"Ok" He nodded, plotting his next approach, "Then is there a reason you're sat on m'bed?" Carol looked up quickly just in time to catch the little smile that followed his question. Then she realised, she'd been sat in his cell for about an hour and had absolutely no explanation as to why. She blushed and looked at the floor in a feeble attempt to hide it.

"Oh... um yes, actually, I was about to start doing lunch and I wondered if you were going out and... wanted it before everyone else?" She cursed herself inwardly at the stupid question. He'd see right through it, but if he did he didn't say a word and placing his crossbow by the wall he replied.

"Nah, don't worry 'bout me."

"Wish I could", she muttered under her breath, pulling herself to her feet. "Sorry" she offered loud enough for him to hear. Avoiding his gaze she took the few steps to the doorway and turned, "Lunch'll be in about half an hour then." He nodded his reply. Pottering about his cell as he listened to her footsteps get quieter down the stairs until they were gone. He sat in the same spot on his bed and pondered for a moment what she was really doing there and how he could find out what was bothering her.


	2. Chapter 2

**I must just say quickly, thank you very much to everyone who read my first chapter and especially to those who reviewed it. It really does spur you on to keep going getting wonderful comments. Please let me know what you think of this one. Chapters start to get longer too.  
**

**Chapter Two**

The cold water numbed her hands and Carol relished the sobering feeling that washed over her. The mound of dirty plates stacked next to her only helped to deepen the miserable feeling resonating inside her. The mood had taken over her day and she presumed it would be sticking around for the foreseeable future. For every clean plate she placed on the drier it seemed a new, dirty one would appear in the bowl. Getting lost in her task she was startled when she felt a small tug on her shirt. "Oh Lizzie, you gave me a fright." She turned to see the girl looking timid.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." Lizzie replied, instinctively stepping backwards. Carol turned back to her washing up hoping the girl would soon leave her alone with her thoughts again. "It's just... you said you'd play with us this afternoon."

"I can't, I'm busy." Carol interjected quickly.

"But you said you-" Lizzie started.

"I said NO Lizzie!" Carol snapped leaning forcibly against the rim of the sink, staring into the foamy water. "Go and play with your sister."

Lizzie bolted for the door without reply and Carol cursed herself for raising her voice at the child. She dried her hands leaving half the dirty plates on the side and leant her back against the sink. That's when she noticed him, casually leaning against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest, emphasising the muscles she'd frequently found herself day dreaming about. She caught Daryl's gaze through the stray strands of hair covering his face. Carol sighed in defeat and her eyes dropped to the floor. He was bound to question her now and she knew there was no escaping him. Silence fell on the pair as Carol continued glaring at a spot on the floor, unable to look up. She could feel his eyes on her and knew it was only a matter of time before he'd form the words to ask her what was going on.

When the silence was finally broken it wasn't by Daryl but by Maggie carrying even more empty plates, she presumed from those already in quarantine. At least everyone had managed to eat, she thought for a fleeting moment.

"Oh, hey. I'm sorry there's so many, it seems never ending today. I'll help dry some." Oblivious to the unspoken tension already in the room Maggie set the plates down and picked up a ragged old dishcloth to begin the drying. Carol silently made a move to continue with her duties, trying to avoid everyone's gaze. "Carol, is everything ok?" Maggie asked noticing her awkward shifting and she placed a hand on the older woman's shoulder. Frustrated that it was so obvious to everyone around that she was troubled Carol began plotting her lie. She mustered up her best smile but Daryl responded first.

"Well, no. Just said she had a bad head so I was try'na get her to ditch these dishes 'n go lie down. Can't be too careful right now." His lie was flawless, perfected with such ease and surety. His eyes never left hers as he waited for Maggie's imminent agreement.

"Of course! Go, I can finish up here, no problem. Do you need anything? Can I bring you something to eat?" Maggie fussed, her hand instinctively checking Carol's forehead for a temperature. She flinched, jumping back ever so slightly, startled and unsure of the girl's intentions. But she wasn't really thinking about that; she was wondering what Daryl's game was. She wasn't sure if she was going to like it but she was sure she couldn't put up with much more of Maggie's fussing. His face was expressionless, he was unreadable and if she was going to find out what he was playing at she'd have to follow his lead.

"Thank you Maggie, but no I'll be fine, I'll only rest for a bit. I think I just overdid it before lunch. Thanks for finishing up for me." And with that she smiled and headed for the door that Daryl had been propping up for as long as he'd been listening to her; she wasn't sure exactly how long that had been.

"No problem" was all she heard from Maggie down the corridor as she made her way outside.

"You didn't need to do that." Carol knew he was following her but she was yet to turn and look him in the eye. She wasn't sure that she wanted to hear what he had to say.

"Did." He replied matter-of-factly from about a step behind her, or so she assumed. "Seemed to me like you needed a break".

"I'm fine." She protested, crossing her arms and staring out onto the yard and the field below.

"As hell you are!" Daryl scoffed, taking a few paces back so he was leaning by the door to "C" block. Carol dropped her hands to her sides and turned to face him. He could see right through her and it dawned on her that she'd have to face up to it and tell him the truth. She wasn't sure she could, what would he think of her? Carol knew she had to say something. The familiar butterflies flared up in her belly. She realised she'd been silent for a few minutes and all the while Daryl had just stood watching her. "You ain't ever like that with Lizzie or Mika. Me maybe, but never them. That ain't you." His softer tone broke the silence. He was intent of getting to the bottom of the issue, whatever it was.

"I just, I'm not good for them right now." She managed, unsure that he'd understand what she meant.

"Course you are!" Ain't nobody here better with those girls 'an you." Daryl defended as best he could, "You just need ta get ya head straight, s'all."

"No." Carol replied simply. Her train of thought was cut short by a shout from across the yard.

"Daryl" Rick called as he entered the yard walking towards "C" block. Before she was spotted Carol dove round the corner out of sight of the approaching deputy. "Daryl, have you seen Carol anywhere?"

Before the redneck replied he glanced in the direction of the wall where Carol had been stood only to find her gone. "...not for a while, she was washing up, maybe check inside." He reeled off the words as easily as he had to Maggie earlier and Carol noted he'd probably had to perfect his technique of lying and hiding his true feelings long ago. She heard one set of footsteps fade off up the stairs into the cellblock and the other set approach the corner she was hiding behind. Carol glanced quickly at Daryl, wondering just exactly what he though was going on in her head. Still, he persisted, gesturing towards the watchtower. "C'mon." He added before heading off whether she followed him or not.


	3. Chapter 3

**Again, thank you so much to everyone who's reading and especially the lovely reviews I've had so far. I'm really pleased people are enjoying it. :) I've just written chapter 8 which is certainly _not_ the last chapter so maybe there's a couple more in it yet. I'll keep posting the ones I've written though. Enjoy!  
**

**Chapter Three**

Carol glanced around the yard, checking for prying eyes, spies that might instantly run and tell Rick she'd been spotted. On seeing no one around Carol paced quickly after Daryl towards the farthest watchtower overlooking the small field of crops they'd created. Remaining a few strides behind him Carol desperately tried to piece together the words in her head to even begin to describe her situation.

Daryl stopped at the foot of the tower holding its door open for Carol to enter. He too seemed to be checking their plan hadn't been foiled by anyone else. Satisfied they wouldn't be disturbed he followed Carol inside, closing the heavy door behind him. The small room at the top of the tower was well stocked with food, weapons and ammunition and even a small mattress for when two people were on watch together and one person needed a break. An uncomfortable silence fell on the pair, something they experienced a lot but rarely with each other. Carol felt the air thicken with tension and as she'd not yet figured out quite what to say she opted for the fresh air of the balcony over Daryl's concerned glare. She took a step outside. Not trusting her nervous legs to hold her for much longer she perched on the edge dangling her feet over the side and she stared off into the distance. Only a few moments past before he followed, sitting to her left leaning his back on the wall of the room. Daryl was just far enough away to be obstructed from her gaze but forward enough so that he could see her expressions.

A silence fell on them again, this time a more comfortable one. Carol sat there willing the perfect sentence to form in her head, one that would sufficiently explain her plight but not result in him hating her. She couldn't stand the thought of that but she knew it would be inevitable now.

"Talk to me." His voice was soft and she could tell his barriers were down. She knew all too well it wasn't something that happened very often and that those opportunities shouldn't be taken lightly. It only made it harder to tell him. She cherished him more than anyone else in the group. How could she lie to him?

"I just wanted to protect them. I promised." She quietly breathed out, seemingly more to herself than to Daryl. She felt a sob well up deep inside her but she pushed it back down. No, if she cried she'd never be able to do it.

He shifted in his spot choosing his words carefully. "You did", he started simply. "You do, but why you snappin' at Lizzie? Y'know she needs ya." Daryl then noticed Carol's expression change and he followed her gaze down until he spotted Lizzie and Mika walking towards the crops below. Buckets in hand they began watering the plants. Looking back up at Carol he sighed, frustrated at himself that he was unable to say the right words to help her open up to him.

She closed her eyes leaning forwards against the railing. "She doesn't need me." Carol finally managed "They're stronger than I could ever give them credit for. In reality they would do absolutely fine without me." She half smiled at the thought of them surviving in this world.

Daryl cleared his throat behind her, uncomfortable with the notion of her going somewhere, or worse. He held back from verbalising his dislike for this thought on the grounds that Carol had only just started opening up to him.

Carol held back the tears as she began explaining the reasons why she'd done the things she had, to the only man whose opinion she really cared about. It took all of Carol's courage and a great long while before she could manage to utter her name out loud. "I just didn't want their fates to be the same as Sophia's." The mere mention of her sent a lone tear cascading down her cheek, as hard as she tried to fight it.

He caught sight of the droplet as it fell from her chin and his hand instinctively hovered inches away from her back. Unable to close the space between them he leant his head back on the wall and sighed sharing in Carol's frustration at not being able to save her daughter. They knew better than anyone, the importance of looking after the children, so no one else had to feel their pain. "That's why I taught them how to use weapons." She confessed easily, it wasn't going to be the hardest thing she had to say to him. "Mainly knives but a bit of everything just to be safe." Safe. She managed a snigger at the word.

Daryl was ready to physically sigh with relief at the admission when Carol interjected abruptly. "All I've ever wanted was for everyone to be safe. We've lost so much already we can't risk losing any more. I made a promise I'd look after those girls…"

"You are!" Daryl interrupted as positively as he could. Carol obviously just needed some space once he'd managed to cool her down.

But if anything, she was calm. She was thinking clearly and rationalising all the decisions she'd made to get to this point. "I made a promise". She repeated the mantra to herself. "Everything I've done has been for the good of the group." She continued in her little pep talk to herself, knowing Daryl would be mentally agreeing with her.

Daryl _was_ agreeing. He would have made this known to her if he'd not been trying to figure out what was upsetting her so much. "Does this have something to do with Rick?" He asked, beginning to get suspicious of her ramblings.

She built up as much courage as she could muster and quietly delivered her confession, "I killed Karen and David. I stabbed them and burned their bodies to prevent the disease spreading. It was me."

She didn't dare turn to him, knowing she'd only be met by a look of confusion and undoubtedly betrayal. She hated herself for doing that to him but she knew he had to know.

The words spun around in his head as he tried to make sense of them. This couldn't possibly be right, not Carol, the epitome of a pure, unspoilt, kind heart. He couldn't bare the thought of all of that being a lie. How could she do that? How could she build up such an image of greatness and hope and optimism, something for him to look up to, only to corrupt it all with one tiny sentence? He was speechless; heartbroken and speechless, even if he was only ready to admit one of those feelings to himself.

"Oh." Carol's soft voice cut through his thoughts and he glanced up to see the older sister walking towards the tower.

"Carol!" Lizzie shouted from a few metres below. The older woman didn't reply, in fact she cowered back slightly in what Daryl presumed to be part of her attempt to keep herself away from the children. That's what the whole thing was about; Carol's way of protecting the girls from the person she'd become. "Carol, can you help us get more water?" Lizzie shouted up again.

Seeing his means of escape Daryl took to his feet and leaned over the rail to shout down to the girls, "I'll help" and with that he retreated back into the glass room and down the cold staircase to the crops outside. He'd deal with Carol later, right at that moment he needed to think.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Sorry for the delay, my life took over a little bit but I'm back now with a new chapter and I hope it makes up for some slight cruelness on my part in the last chapter. I think this chapter starts to give you all an idea of where I'm going with this so please stick with it and have faith :) Hope you all enjoyed the midseason premier, here's some Carol/Daryl for those of you who are missing them. Thanks again for the great reviews, I love reading them.  
**

**Chapter Four**

He sat on the edge of the picnic table leaning on his knees as he listened to the steady trickle of water slowly filling up the bucket. She was still sat there, up in the watchtower, occasionally glancing down at the two girls she cared so much for. He didn't know what to think. He knew as well as anyone at the prison that people often had their moments of losing faith and getting lost on this strange new road they were treading, but he always drew strength from Carol as a constant and unfaltering member of his family.

He cursed himself for not taking more time to ask after her. She'd changed, he knew that but only now was he realising not all that change was for the better. He'd taught her how to protect herself for those times he wasn't there to watch her back and now she was passing that knowledge onto the next generation. He didn't mind, in anything he agreed with it. Just as she'd said, Carol was just trying to protect them, like he did her. Maybe that's why she killed them, he thought. He knew deep down there couldn't be any other reason. She did it for the group. She did it in the vain hope that it would stop the virus spreading and infecting the people she loved. He knew she'd done it as humanely as she could, by stabbing them and then burning the bodies to prevent the spread. He knew she couldn't have any other motive. Only Daryl was aware of how much Carol had felt like a burden at the farm and so he'd spent those long winter months on the road teaching her how to fight, how to hunt and all the necessary skills she'd need to look after herself should the worst ever happen. He disliked the reasons for teaching her but it gave him some peace of mind know she'd be at least a little prepared.

On reflection he had to admit those lessons were when he was at him most content. The time they spent just the two of them in the woods was when he'd learned to let down his barriers. They'd talk and joke and Carol would tease him until the noise would scare away anything remotely close enough for them to hunt. He smiled in remembrance before realising the bucket had been filled long ago and was now overflowing, its contents running in a stream down the yard. "Shit." He cussed jumping to his feet. Turning off the tap he picked up the bucket and started pacing down towards the field.

He'd come to the conclusion that he partly blamed himself for Carol's actions. They didn't spend anything like the amount of time alone together as they had done on the road. If they had, and he'd taken the time to ask after her, maybe she'd have felt as though she could have come to him about it. But she didn't, she chose to take the decision into her own hands and that hurt. He didn't mind admitting it.

Daryl reached the plot the two girls were working on and decided the first thing he'd do when he next spoke to Carol would be to apologise for not being there. They knew what it was like to have no one left and he blamed himself for dropping the ball, leaving Carol to make decision on her own.

"Where's this goin' then?" He asked as the busy girls spun round from tending to the runner beans.

"Please could you water the peas Daryl?" Mika pointed a couple of metres away to a row of healthy looking pea plants. He began tipping the bucket over the base of the plants occasionally glancing over to the girls.

"Whatcha doin'?" Daryl asked, placing the empty bucket by his feet. He stood arms crossed scrutinising them closely. He wasn't a gardener, that was Rick's territory but he needed something to take his mind off Carol.

"We're tying up the baby shoots so they grow up big and tall and don't snap and die." The younger girl informed, taking great pleasure in Daryl's interest.

"Huh." Daryl replied softly studying Mika's technique. "Can I help?"

"Sure." Mika sprung to her feet and grabbed a ball of twine. She unravelled some and began wrapping it around the stake of wood she'd planted. "Then you just tie the stem loosely to the wood." She smiled up to Daryl obviously quite proud she was able to teach the seemingly all-knowing Daryl Dixon how to do something.

"Easy." He replied offering a cheeky grin to the girl.

"Here, you can use these." Mike picked up a stake of wood for Daryl to begin helping with the other runner bean plants. "Lizzie, can I borrow your knife?" The girl took the offered weapon and sliced the twine in two handing a strand to Daryl, an innocent smile on her face. Taking the twine Daryl looked from Mike to Lizzie. She placed the knife swiftly back in its sheath and carried on with her work.

"Did Carol give you that?" Daryl broached cautiously.

"She knows I have it if that's what you mean." Lizzie replied curtly, "So there's no need to go telling on me."

"I wouldn't do that." Daryl replied quickly. "It's ok, I know she's been teachin' ya how ta protect y'selves."

"It's about time." Lizzie cut in. "She needs to let us do more, we're capable."

"She just wants you to be safe, so you'll be ok if we're not around to protect you." Daryl defended trying to reassure the girl as Mika stood and watched nervously.

"No!" Lizzie protested. "You're on the council, can't you get them to let us help fight? We can do it."

"Oh Lizzie be quiet." Mika angrily retorted as Daryl looked on in surprise. Turning to the older man Mika smiled sweetly and responded, "Ignore her, she doesn't mean it."

"I do." Lizzie puffed before teasing her sister, "You're just scared."

"Am not! But you know what Carol said." Mika warned lowering her tone.

"I don't care. We've proven ourselves! Well… I have." Lizzie blurted proudly.

"You have?!" Daryl interjected carefully, aware that maybe he shouldn't pry.

"Yes. It needed doing, so I did it. I kil…"

"Stop Lizzie!" Mika's plea cut her boasting sister off but she was quickly ignored as Daryl began piecing together what the girls were saying.

"Wait." He started, staring closely at Lizzie. "Karen and David?" were the only words he could manage and he almost choked on them as the full gravity of the situation hit him. Lizzie's eyes stayed trained on his and she remained quiet for a moment.

"Yes. It was me." She finally admitted, no remorse detectable in her voice.

Glancing over to Mika Daryl noticed the tears in her eyes and the look of disgust on her face as she watched her sister. His gaze shot up to the watchtower, to the woman who nought but thirty seconds ago he'd felt as though he didn't know anymore, but she was gone.

No sooner had he turned towards the prison to look for her did the gates swing open allowing one of the many vehicles they had to speed down the gravel track towards them. Holding his hand up to shield the sun from his eyes Daryl squinted trying to make out who was in such a hurry. The car screeched to a stop when it reached him and the window rolled down.

"C'mon, we gotta go." Michonne began, "I know we weren't gonna go till tomorrow but it's getting really bad, Glenn's sick too, we needs those meds now."

Daryl just stood, staring at the car. He wasn't quite sure he'd heard everything Michonne had said but he knew wherever she was trying to make him go, he had to speak to Carol first.

"Daryl!" Michonne snapped, getting impatient.

"Um, yeah. Well, I can't go just yet, I need ta…" He trailed off, his eyes wandering up to the prison.

"No time, get in." Michonne ordered bluntly, pointing at the seat next to her.

Daryl noticed Bob and Tyreese in the back as he tried desperately to think of a reason not to go. He caught sight of their bags, "Let me go grab some things first." He suggested pointing at the prison.

"Got them, I grabbed your pack. Let's go." She has an answer for everything and he was all out of ideas. Picking up his crossbow he slunk into the passenger's seat and wished just once he could drop his silly pretence and be honest about _his _needs. He glanced back to the two girls. Mika looked at him anxiously but Lizzie had gone back to her twining, seemingly without a care in the world for what she'd done and whom she had affected in the process.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Once again huge thanks to everyone who's continuing to read my small offering in this big world of fanfic we live in. :) This chapter swaps POVs a bit. I can't stick to just Carol or Daryl, their characters are just too interesting for me not to write both POVs. Hope you enjoy.  
**

**Chapter Five**

Carol threw the pile of clothing she'd collected onto the floor in front of her. She sighed heavily as she sank down onto the stool and began loading some of the clothes into the bowl of warm suds she'd prepared earlier. The menial job of washing everyone's clothes was only slightly taking her mind off what had occurred earlier in the day. Now that she'd sat down and mindlessly begun scrubbing away at the muck her thoughts began to wander. She was beginning to worry, Daryl had been successfully avoiding her all afternoon and she felt a tinge of hurt that he'd not cared to come and look for her. Then she realised what she'd said to him and decided he'd surely never come looking for her again. A heavy sigh escaped her, followed by a tear that she quickly wiped away with her sleeve. Carol concluded to herself that that had been the hardest part of the whole thing. She still didn't regret it, she just wished hadn't all been at the expense of Daryl's friendship.

"Man up." She muttered quietly to herself. She knew the only reason she'd admitted to it was to protect those girls and she'd be damned if she was going back on her word now. She'd come so far with the lie, she'd done what she felt was the hardest part, now it was time to face the consequences, whatever they were.

Carol's heart fluttered as she contemplated what Rick might say to her but she was filled with a new found optimism knowing that as long as he and Daryl and the group believed it had been her then Lizzie and Mika would be safe. That's all it boiled down to, they were her main priority now and as long as they were safe then it would all be worth it.

Carol carried the freshly washed clothing out to the yard to hang dry. It was mid afternoon and the sun was shining over the prison. She managed a smile before grabbing some pegs to hang up the trousers she'd just picked up. As she worked she heard footsteps heading towards her. She closed her eyes and hoped with all her might that it was Daryl coming to talk to her.

"Carol." It was a man's voice but probably the last one she wanted to hear. Her heart skipped a beat nervously but she remained silent, her eyes cast down. "I've been looking for you all afternoon." His voice was devoid of emotion.

"Well you've found me." She replied sarcastically. As much as Carol presumed Rick would be the one dolling out her punishment she felt no need to pussyfoot around him. She had her reasons for saying what she had and was mentally prepared for whatever her could throw at her.

"I'm going on a supply run and I'd like you to come with me." Rick commented dryly.

Carol turned to face him for the first time. He looked anxious and her mind raced. This wasn't quite what she was expecting. "Why aren't you taking any of the others?" She asked, trying to make sense of his request.

"They've gone to get the meds already. I've asked Maggie to look after the place so it's just you and me."

"Oh. I see." Carol quietly finished hanging up the washing before following the deputy back into "C" block to collect their things. She wasn't sure what was going on but at least the fresh air would help clear her mind.

* * *

Daryl could hear the others discussing the route a few metres away. He didn't care which way they went as long as they got back sharpish, and in one piece. He leant back heavily into the passenger seat and sighed. Having had such a successful run Daryl would have normally been in a much more jovial mood but right then all he wanted to do was get back to the prison; back to Carol. He hadn't been able to settle the whole time they'd been on the hunt for the meds. He'd focussed as best he could but his tempers had frayed. It all led back to Carol. The frustration was still mainly stemming from his own actions, or lack thereof, and the ifs or buts he had regarding what he wished he'd already done. He couldn't take all of the credit though he blamed Rick too. The man obviously knew and hadn't told anyone else. He had no right to take it all on by himself. He shouldn't have been looking to speak to her without the others present, without _him_ present. Daryl knew she needed protecting, more than ever and now it wasn't just from the undead.

"Com'on. Get a move on." He shouted over to the others, his impatience clear in his voice. He wanted to be back there, needed to be back there. He was on the council now and as much as he'd resented that fact in the beginning he was going to use that power to his advantage now in Carol's favour. She'd need all the help she could get if she wasn't willing to tell the truth, which Daryl was pretty sure she wouldn't if he knew anything about her.

He shifted uncomfortably in his seat and fished out the piece of Jasper he'd picked up earlier in the run. He looked at it closely, turning it in his fingers carefully. It was a deep and murky shade of forest green. It was one of the nicest stones he'd ever found. He remembered the conversation he'd had with Mrs Richards before they'd left. She'd asked him to pick up one to use as a marker for her husband's grave. Holding a small soft spot for the lady Daryl had of course agreed straight away but Mrs Richards insisted on explaining the meaning behind it. He didn't mind and smiled along with her stories. She'd told him Jasper was known as a warrior stone. Her husband had bought her a green jasper necklace on their wedding day to symbolise his loyalty to her. Daryl had watched Mrs Richards fondly as she slipped off into a long since passed daydream before he quietly walked away to prepare for the run.

He spun the stone in his fingers again and wished with hindsight that he'd found two. Carol was the loyalist person he'd ever known and she'd done more than enough to qualify as a warrior in his eyes. In fact, she'd done the most selfless act he'd ever witnessed. He never stopped being amazed by her. The sun beat down heavily onto the car and he admired how the rays bounced off the uneven edges of the gloomy looking gem. Licking his finger he cleaned off the muck, exposing the deep emerald veins underneath.

"Loyalty, inner strength, thinking only of others and always standing up for what you believe in. That was my Eric" Mrs Richards had explained. Daryl looked down at the stone. Every word Mrs Richards had said reminded him of Carol. Even at the time he'd smiled at the resemblance, now it just sounded like a list of her attributes. Why had he ever doubted her? The familiar rage bubbled up from within him as he clenched the stone tightly into his palm, frustration cursing through his body. He sighed heavily, he knew there was nothing to be gained from his anger, not now anyway, he just needed to get back.

* * *

It wasn't the run that was worrying her. They'd done well found everything they needed, plus a little more. No, it was Rick's behaviour that was worrying her. He'd been acting strangely all day and the feeling only seemed to be growing.

"We should go", Carol remarked feeling anxious. They'd waited for the couple they'd ran into for too long and Carol knew by now they wouldn't be coming. She felt uneasy, Rick had been cagey and quiet all day, as if he was secretly judging her every move. Her head was pretty much in a spin and her body mirrored her minds unhappy state. She was exhausted. She needed to sleep then she'd confront the issue again in the morning, when hopefully Rick would also be feeling less scatty.

She made her way round to the car door and pulled. Locked. She glared at Rick. His expression was stern and she saw in him something she'd not seen in a long while. He looked decisive. Her heart sank.

"They might have lived." He began. She immediately recognised the decision reflected in his face and the truth of it was she was shocked. She swallowed hard, fighting the acidic taste rising at the back of her throat. "When the others find out, they won't want you here." He continued coldly and she let a tear slip down her cheek as his words cut into her.

He was right. Carol already knew the one person she cared for had deserted her without a word. Daryl would probably shake Rick's hand at the news, if he hadn't already been told of Rick's intentions. She had nothing left to lose and yet that didn't stop it hurting. "I won't have you there." The words hit her like a freight train, the final nail in the coffin. They'd been through so much together and one little lie had cost her everything she had left in the world. Her hands shook and her breath caught in her throat.

"You think I'm going anywhere without Lizzie and Mika." Carol started defensively. He could kick her out, fine, but she'd made a promise to those girls and she couldn't see herself doing anything without them now.

"We'll keep them safe." Rick replied finally. He'd made up his mind and it was clear nothing Carol could say would change that. She wiped quickly at the tears on her face and mentally faced up to what was ahead. At least the girls would be safe and with her gone there'd be no one else there that knew the truth. She sighed a sad smile, he was right. She could die out here; it wasn't safe for the girls. She'd done everything in her power to save them.

Carol climbed into the driver's seat of the vehicle they'd commandeered for her and took in her surroundings. She'd have to have a new frame of mind if she was ever going to survive on the road again. Her mind wandered briefly to her lessons on the road with Daryl and she smiled. She knew she may never see him again and those happy memories would be all that remained on the cold, lonely nights ahead. And yet still she had no regrets. If this was the sacrifice she had to make to save the lives of those children then so be it. She smiled, satisfied with herself as she pulled away from the kerb. Gazing dead ahead she drove straight past Rick and out onto the main road, in the opposite direction of the prison.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: So this chapter was one of the main reasons I wanted to write this story. As much as I understand why they made Daryl react in the way he did to the news about Carol's banishment, as soon as I watched it I just wanted to make my own version. So here we are. I hope I did these characters justice because they just rock. And I must thank everyone again for reading and especially reviewing, it's so great to read what you think about this story so please keep commenting. :) Thanks.**

**Chapter Six**

Dawn of the following day was the first chance any of them had to catch their breath. The light of a new day had followed a long night of travelling for Daryl, Michonne, Tyreese and Bob and an even loner night at the prison. They'd arrived back to chaotic scenes of walkers breaching the fence and an outbreak in quarantine. They began shifting the bodies when Tyreese and Daryl made a start reinstating the broken sections of fence. They knew it would take them a few hours but it had to be their main priority, everything else would have to wait.

Finally, satisfied with their work, Daryl and Tyreese drove the truck back up to the yard. Daryl's next thought turned to Carol. He'd waited too long to speak to her as it was and not even the urge to eat or sleep could get in the way now. Slamming the door shut Daryl paced towards tge cells just as Hershel was coming out. He looked warn down and exhausted. Daryl empathised with the older man; he'd always respected him.

"They all seem stable enough for me to get some air" Hershel smiled softly, enjoying the morning breeze on his face. He'd earned the break. Daryl wasn't sure exactly what had happened the previous night but he knew that if it involved caring for the sick then Hershel would have been first in line to help.

"What about Carol?" He asked as nonchalantly as he could, "She up in "A" block with Lizzie?"

"No," the older man replied calmly, "Talk to Rick about her." Daryl's heart skipped a beat at Hershel's ambiguous comment and he shielded his eyes from the sun with his hand, squinting to make him out clearer. "She's ok." He continued, "Just talk to him."

Daryl looked up towards the prison trying to fathom in his head what Hershel could mean. His feet began walking before he even realised he'd told them to and he felt his stride quicken as he reached the steps. Panic spread through him like a wild fire and his face flushed as he searched for Rick. He didn't even know what to say but he knew he needed answers.

Daryl made his way quickly through the prison corridors, passing and knocking people as he went/ Striding into "C" block he found a handful of people sorting through boxes of supplies on the tables of their communal area. He eyed them for a second, maintaining his calm exterior until he glanced around to see Rick appear from the cells behind him. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Daryl stood still, staring intensely. Rick glanced towards the others in the room and asked softly, "Could you give us a minute?" They nodded in reply and left the two men alone in the block.

Daryl could feel Rick tense up when the door slammed behind the last person. His eyes never left Rick's face as he searched it for answers. Daryl didn't know where to begin or what to say. He knew the worst thing to do would be to jump to conclusions but why else would Hershel have been so vague? "She did it, Daryl." Rick's words, although spoken softly, echoed around the room, reverberating inside him. He knew Carol had told Rick but what had happened since he'd been gone, since he hadn't been around to protect her? His eyes remained trained on Rick who was looking less confident by the second. A fire raged within him but he remained silent, he needed to know where she was. "She killed Karen and David." Rick reiterated and Daryl inwardly snorted at the patronising presumption that he needed it spelling out for him. No, he knew very well what the deputy was inferring but he wasn't yet ready to break his silence and ease the tension. "I couldn't have her here." Rick asserted confidently but Daryl wasn't convinced. The pieces began fitting themselves together in his head and he clenched his fists tightly as the fire smouldered in the pit of his stomach. "She'll be fine, she has a car and supplies. She's a survivor, but she couldn't stay here." Rick finished, fully submersing himself back into his Dictator leader role again.

Damn right she was a survivor, he'd made sure of it. At least he had in terms of defending herself, but her determined, optimistic survival instinct; that was all her and it was what he loved about her the most. How could Rick just throw her out like yesterday's rubbish? He'd taken it upon himself to make and implement this decision and it was taking every fibre in Daryl's being to not strike the man where he stood.

"She's changed Daryl. She wasn't sorry." Rick carried on, defending his decision to banish Carol. "She couldn't be here like that, she's a danger to us all… she'd a danger to the children." That was enough. He physically scoffed at the stupidity of Rick's suggestion. How could he even think that? She wasn't sorry because she had nothing to be sorry for and at the back of his mind he was impressed by her courage and strength to not back down and come clean to Rick. It was almost humorous to hear him speak about Carol like that but the fact that he was serious only riled him up even more.

He took a step forward towards Rick and repeated the line back to him so he could hear its absurdity. "A danger to the children?!" He paced the floor, his own words making him silently gasp in disbelief as he tried to come to terms with what he'd been told. The instant thought of Carol on the road alone, abandoned by someone she called family made him sick and he found he couldn't look at Rick. The selfish fool had cast out one of the foundation stones of the group and the only person he really cared for. He could feel his rage rise up from his feet through his clenched fists and into his face like molten metal surging through a mould. "You _dumb ass_ son of a bitch!" He exploded towards Rick finally connecting his fist with the man's jaw. The sting was welcomed as he grabbed Rick's shirt with both hands hoisting him back to his feet. Blood spilled from his nose as Daryl prepared to hit him again but he stopped. A voice inside his head said no and instead he catapulted the man backwards into the waiting concrete wall of the prison. Rick hissed as he slid down onto the floor and watched nervously as Daryl paced in front of him. He couldn't look at Rick, not if he wanted to let the man keep all his teeth. Instead he swept his strong arms across the pile of boxes on the table and sent their contents crashing to the floor. The noise echoed around the walls and soon he heard feet running towards them. A small group entered the room and observed the scene. Maggie gasped but Hershel managed to hold her back. Daryl ignore the shocked onlookers and Rick made an effort to get to his feet. Before he could stand Daryl was towering over him pushing him back down. He knelt in front of the deputy and squaring up to him uttered dryly, "You had no right." The pure hatred was evident in his stare and Rick's breathing gave his fear away. Deep down the old Daryl smiled wickedly to find he still had the power to intimidate and the grin only broadened knowing it was Rick he'd scared. The Daryl that was here, now, however, took no pleasure in Rick's discomfort, it was doing nothing to bring Carol back. He pushed himself up to stand again and looked at the confused faces scattered around the room. The space between the two men gave Rick his confidence back and he tried again to get Daryl onside.

"Carol killed them in cold blood, Daryl." Rick repeated her crime, this time so everyone could hear and they gasped. Some whispered "no" but mostly there was silence. Daryl felt his anger building again as he was made to listen to Rick tread all over Carol's previously unfaltering character. His deformation of her cut him deep and it took all his strength not to blow her cover and make her sacrifice meaningless. He wasn't as strong as her though and he struggled to come to terms with the thought of not having her in his life. Daryl looked back at Rick. The man had made it to his feet but remained with his back against the concrete. He eyed Daryl nervously, clutching his jaw, testing its ability to function.

"We know what she meant to you." Rick offered simply but all he got in return was another patronising scoff. Daryl stepped towards Rick making him flinch.

"Don't you dare make this about me!" Daryl replied through gritted teeth. It didn't matter how he felt, Rick had crossed the line; he'd just made it worse by the fact that it was Carol. Had it been somebody else maybe Rick's jaw would have stayed intact but it was his own damn foolish fault for sending her away. This was Carol and he wasn't sorry. "Don't you get it?" Daryl began, a fresh new wave of anger and sadness crashing through him. "This is Carol for Christ's sake!" His attempts to defend her were falling flat and that only made him angrier. The only way to make it right would be to come clean, he just hoped she wouldn't be mad at him for doing it; and that was under the assumption that he'd ever see her again. "She didn't do it." His voice was soft and the exhaustion of the past two days hit him in one fell swoop. She was gone. The realisation that he'd never see her again almost brought him to his knees. If that was to be the case then in his mind it didn't matter if they knew the truth or not. He couldn't stand idly by and watch as Rick tarnished her name. "She was covering", He continued heavy heartedly, "for Lizzie." Daryl could almost hear the pennies dropping in everyone's minds like it had in his own when Lizzie had told him. He didn't want any harm to come to the little girl but at least this way she could be taught to feel remorse for her actions. Mainly though, Carol didn't deserve to he branded a murderer, she deserved to be remembered as he always had; a sweet, kind, selfless human being who had every right to be in their group and to whom many of them owed their lives through her various contributions.

"But… she said." Rick stuttered, "She told me she did it."

"Course she did!" Daryl found himself face to face with Rick again. "An' you didn't even question it fer a second!" He spat viciously, unsatisfied by the deputy's reaction. "You son of a bitch, yer left her out there t'die! Alone!" His voice cracked as the last word crossed his lips and he cursed himself for letting his emotions show.

Rick was silent; the whole room was silent, long enough for Daryl to collect his thoughts. "I'm goin' after her." He knew no one would try and stop him but he hadn't expected to see so many people nodding in agreement. Rick's eyes were cast down as the redneck approached him. Daryl leant forward and spoke quietly to the guilt stricken man, "If somethin' happens to her or those girls… I'll _never_ forgive you." He turned before Rick could reply and walked straight passed the stunned faces of his friends towards his cell to collect his things.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Hi again! I'm sorry there's been such a huge delay with getting this chapter up, in all honesty I'm coming to the end of writing this and the last two chapters I wrote I ended up scrapping and starting again. I just wasn't happy! A lot of it was from Daryl's POV and he's such a complex character I was finding myself annoyed at not doing him justice. I just hope you all think I've done a good job with it! I think there'll be three more chapters after this but we still have some obstacles to get over before the finale :) Thank you so much for sticking with me, it's a great feeling getting your wonderful reviews and favourites, so please do keep them coming, I read them all. :) Now let's get back to getting these two back together again. Enjoy. x  
**

**Chapter Seven**

He frantically began shoving things into his backpack. Daryl knew Carol had at least a 12-hour head start on him but if he didn't head out soon it would only become harder to find her. He sighed heavily, pausing for a moment to perch on his mattress and let the whole situation sink in. It'd only been a few days since Carol had sat in the same spot silently battling her thoughts. He hadn't known at the time what was troubling her but he wished more than anything now to go back to that point and just sit with her. Sit with her until she felt she could talk to him, but hindsight is a wonderful thing and regrets about the past weren't going to bring her back.

A soft rapping on the bars to his cell interrupted his thoughts and he glanced up to see Hershel.

"May I?" He asked, gesturing to the small stool by the entrance. Daryl nodded half-heartedly, avoiding the older man's gaze. Picking up his backpack he started organising his things again, anything to distract his fidgeting hands. "Rick said she headed west from the small town you scouted last week." Hershel's voice was calm but Daryl could sense the urgency in his words. He expected Hershel to leave then but he remained seated and it made Daryl nervous.

"Anything else?" He asked carefully, thumbnail in his mouth chewing anxiously.

"Don't think we don't believe you'll bring her back safe and sound…" Hershel started, cautiously. Daryl sighed and fidgeted in his seat. He didn't like where this was going and he didn't have time to listen to a lecture. "You know we need you here. Don't be gone too long."

"I'll be gone as long as it takes." Daryl replied, his impatience building. "I ain't comin' back without her." His voice was softer and he stared down at his feet. "I can't."

Hershel mirrored Daryl's gaze. He understood that looking at him directly would make him feel more uncomfortable. He'd only recently begun to fathom out Daryl's behaviour and his nuances but he knew enough to recognise that he was something of an iceberg. Very few in the group had been privy to a glimpse of the person he kept hidden under the glassy waters. Hershel felt that this was as close as he'd get to one of those moments. He smiled briefly at the privilege and at the progress this man had made, even in the short time he'd known him. As closed off and private as he was Hershel knew there weren't nearly as many barriers between Daryl and the world anymore. They mainly had Carol to thank for that. They'd silently found each other through their grief and their similarly tragic pasts. They'd quietly supported each other, so quietly in fact Hershel was sure neither of them realised the effect they were having on the other. Without her there pieces of him were being chipped away. Each false accusation chiselled away at him until inevitably the weight and gravity of the whole situation threatened to capsize him altogether and reveal his previously hidden true thoughts and feelings. They'd almost seen it with Rick but he'd held back. Hershel knew that if the iceberg ever capsized it would happen in front of the only person who wouldn't be shocked by what she saw underneath.

* * *

He flung his bag on the bike and jumped on quickly before anyone could come and say good luck. He didn't want a fuss; he just wanted to find her. He sped down the gravel track and out of the gates, nodding lightly to Maggie as he passed her. Finally. The breeze was welcoming and he settled into the journey. He knew what he had to do and he pushed the bike forward in the direction of the town where Rick had left Carol.

Daryl's mind had been focussed on his task and he huffed, satisfied with his progress as he reached the outskirts of the town. He wasn't sure exactly where Rick and Carol had been when they'd parted ways but it didn't matter as there was only one road that he could see leading west out of the town, so that's where he headed.

An hour passed before he reached anything that wasn't rolling fields with the occasional walker flitting past in the distance. The cluster of buildings he'd stumbled across was easy to check quickly. He counted five at first glance, they were small and some he didn't even have to enter. Daryl could tell they'd not been disturbed for years. In other circumstances he'd have checked them for anything useful but right then he didn't want to waste any more time. Jumping back on the bike he pressed on.

The clouds rolled in threatening rain and he began to wish he'd come by car. Rain was all he needed to add to the challenge of tracking Carol. Any hope he had was beginning to fade with the setting sun. He sighed heavily before deciding he should find a place to camp the night. A few miles down the road Daryl was distracted from his task though. He slowed to a crawl fifty metres from the abandoned car. It'd been the first car he'd seen in a while but that wasn't what had caught his attention. The driver's side door swung wide open and as he came parallel to it he read the words "Pardon our dust" etched across the windows. The writing was pretty fresh from what he could tell and part of him inwardly cursed himself for not questioning Rick on what kind of car Carol had left in. He brushed away the thought quickly and jumping off the bike he inspected the car carefully. There was still enough light for him to see that whomever had been driving had punctured their front left tyre. He popped the trunk and instead of finding a spare he found a half full can of fuel. He pondered its significance before closing the boot with a slam. Beyond that Daryl couldn't decipher anything else from the vehicle. He stood for a moment before his finger met with the glass of the rear window. His eyes narrowed in concentration ignoring the tight knotting sensation in his stomach as his fingers spelled out "Stay safe Carol."

He forced his mind back on the job deducing that the driver had either commandeered another vehicle, which he deemed unlikely as there hadn't been any for a long while, or more likely, they were now on foot. Daryl jumped back on the bike with new-found enthusiasm and slowly started down the road again. He kept his eyes fixed on the tree line to his left for any disturbances, or better, any buildings. The fields to his right would probably be useless but he kept an eye out for lonely houses on the horizon. Five miles later and not a track had been found. His mind once again wandered to the task of finding somewhere to sleep.

He was so desperately tired he almost missed the lifeless walker lying just to the left of the road. Its facial features could no longer be made out but Daryl wasn't sure if that was a result of its life as a walker or the bloody good stabbing it'd had from whomever it had tried to eat. He half smiled, it seemed like the thing had been used as a punch-bag for someone's frustrations.

* * *

Daryl couldn't even estimate how far he'd come before the tiny row of houses came into view. The sun had set a couple of hours previously and he was almost overjoyed to not have to sleep outside. The rain had just begun to pour and so Daryl quickly made for the closest house. He found it empty and after munching down a tin of soup he found in the kitchen cupboards he stomped up the stairs to find the biggest bed he could. His exhaustion was all encompassing and he couldn't even manage to take his jacket off before his head found the dusty pillow and he fell into a much-needed deep sleep. His normally dreamless mind filled with the thoughts and emotions associated with finding Carol alive and it only made him more determined in his hunt for her.


End file.
